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A Letter to My Sister: Finding Your Worth

Social media is full of insecure people, both men and women love to use filters and photoshop to hide their insecurities and make everybody think that they fit into this box that society calls "perfection". A lot of girls may feel that showing more skin in photos makes them more appealing or makes them feel more confident. Some people turn to smoking because everybody else is doing it or it makes them feel "cool". The same goes for people who like to drink or go to nightclubs. The list of things that people will do to find worth or to fit in seems neverending. At the end of the day, when we turn to the world for approval that list is going to keep getting longer because there is not a thing on this earth that will fulfill you like God can.


Relationships are nice, I am not going to lie. In fact, it is how God intended for us to live, in community with one another. However, even though "a sweet friendship can refresh the soul" (Proverbs 27:9), it is not meant to take God's place. relationships of any kind, platonic or not cannot fulfill our soul. Living as if other people can fulfill us will not only leave us feeling empty but will also leave us feeling unsatisfied. Married life is great, there have been a lot of blessings that have come from being married, but John does not fulfill me. Without God, I don't think there would even be a relationship. John and I both recognize that we cannot complete each other, only true fulfillment comes from God and God alone.


Though marriage is a beautiful and holy covenant created by God, being single is also very important and not a season that should be wasted. When I was 13 years old, I made the decision to actively pursue God with my whole heart, I was not perfect and will never be a perfect Christian, all I knew, is that I wanted to live like Jesus. During that time I really focused on drawing closer to Christ and I became very intentional about the kind of man I wanted to marry one day. Admittedly, there were a few times that I found myself crushing on "bad boys" who charmed me or were attractive but I did not want to settle. There were times when I felt lonely because it seemed like all the other girls at school were happy with their boyfriends and sometimes it's just nice to have somebody around that will listen to you and be there for you when you need somebody. I understand the appeal of being in a relationship, it can make it hard to be content with being single. Something I learned during my single seasons is that being single allows you to find your worth in God rather than somebody else. Here is the reality of it all, if you get into a relationship before you have built a firm foundation in the Lord, you will end up finding your worth in who you are dating. Matthew 7:24-25 says, "Everyone then, who hears these words of Mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on the house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock".


I am not saying it is easy, nothing in life is easy but building your foundation on God was the best decision I ever made. There were many ups and downs and many times that I would be focused on the approval of others over what God says about me, but in the end, my house was not shaken when the storms came. I encourage you today to be joyful in the season that you are in, and that you will see this as an opportunity to grow in your faith with Jesus. I pray that you will be hopeful and trust that God has the perfect husband for you. One that will pursue you, love you, serve you, and most importantly, lead you to Jesus every day.


"Dear Jesus,

You are so good to me. No matter the lies that society throws my way, I know that your words will always be true. Thank you for loving me so unconditionally. Please be the firm foundation in my life so that when storms come, I will not be shaken because my life will be built on you. I praise you for who you are.


In Your Holy and Righteous name, amen. "



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